Dealing With Tantrums

My son is the size of a two year old – with the strength of an ox. It seems my son’s tantrums are getting worse as he age. He kicks, he screams, he throws his head around like a wrecking ball, he rolls around on the floor, he cries big old crocodile tears, and screams on the top of his lungs. It doesn’t matter where we are, if he doesn’t get his way, he’ll throw one faster than you can say “no”. I used to call him Quick-Draw McGraw because of how fast he throws tantrums over the the smallest things.  He’s the fastest in the West – and the East.

When he throws one of his famous tantrums, I just sit him down and look at him. If I need to finish cooking, I just walk away and let him have it. There’s nothing I can do to stop the tantrums because I’m stubborn. If I mean no, that’s exactly what I mean. So if he can’t have something, he’s not going to get it. I put my foot down and he hates it. He doesn’t realize yet that I’m very patient and when it comes to kids throwing tantrums in public, I can’t be embarrassed; and I don’t apologize to bystanders. You can’t control a mad baby because they can’t control their emotions. Getting him to calm down in the past has resulted in a black eye, a busted lip, and loose teeth. I learned my lesson after the loose teeth. Wrangling a child the size of a 2-year-old is not wise when they are as strong as a bull. It’s best to put them on the floor and let them have it.

We’ve been in doctor’s offices where he was plotting to rip up all the magazines on the coffee table. I saw his plan in motion and I nipped in the bud. He was thoroughly upset and people watched, and so did I. He realized that his tantrum wasn’t getting the desired results, so he quit. He eye-balled the magazines and I eye-balled him. He’d look at me once in a while to see if I’m looking at him and yea, I’d be staring him down and he just act like the magazines don’t exist. He’ll play with the toys, but not after he gets my smile of approval, though. For some reason, he needs confirmation because in his little head, I’m the wicked witch of the west and I’m the one who tells him what he can play with and when.

I don’t stress myself over his tantrums because we both know they won’t last long and I’ll wait till he’s done.

If this is what I’m going to have to deal with until he’s about 10 I guess, then, someone is in for quite a few rude awakenings and I’m not sure who, yet.

Enhanced by Zemanta

25 Realizations of Raising A Little Person

This first year of being a mom has been a long one and from another person’s standpoint it’ll only get worse before it get’s better. They’re little people with a lot of attitude but they love the people who take care of them to death. They’ll drive you nuts but it’ll be your turn for payback soon enough…

The chance to snuggle your child is almost impossible. Ever tried snuggling a 12 month old while they’re awake? Yea, been there done that – won’t do it again. I have to wait till my son is conked out for the day to get my snuggles. I used to be able to kiss the bridge of his nose and hold him close. Now, I can’t even get ¼th of a snuggle without him wiggling, screaming, and pulling my hair.
Soon, you will no longer kiss them adorable little feet. I say this because they’ll eventually have an odor and unless you like foot odor on your lips, then by all means, kiss away.
They’ll want what you got all the time. I thought not being able to eat without my son staring me down until I gave him my food came later. Boy was I proved wrong today. I was eating a Hot Pocket when Adam dropped everything he was doing, crawled up to me and tugged on my shirt whining until I gave him what I had. He bullied me out of half of my Hot Pocket.
They will siphon all of your energy. When they are 2-4 months, you get to sit back and relax; watch them drool on themselves and squirm around on their bellies. You pretty much don’t have to move until it’s time to change, feed and burp them, and put them to bed. 6 months and up? Oh no. They want all of your energy and they will take it from you whether you think they can or not.
People will ask you questions you don’t want to answer. “Is he walking yet?”, “How old is he?”, “How tall is his dad?”, “How old are you?” You don’t want to answer these questions but you have to be nice to the old coot standing in line behind you at CVS.
When you think you’ve baby-proofed enough, they find ways to prove you wrong. It’s hard baby-proofing as it is but when they find ways to get into drawers you thought you secured, or you think they’re not tall enough to reach on top of your desk? Well…
Those slaps start to REALLY hurt. I mean REALLY hurt because they usually have a solid object in their hands or their hand is the size of a toddler’s foot. When they get that coördination right and they in that mood to swing at you, watch out! Then again, my son looks like he can palm a basketball. So imagine that plus not realizing the force and damage that little hand can do and you may want to sign him up for boxing lessons.
Pulling hair gets worse as they get older. The little tugs my son used to give my hair has turned into full-fledged yank and snatches. Mind as well start calling me patches because I lose a handful of hair a day.
Objectionable things some parents do in public with their children jump out at you like a tornado in a trailer park. Ever see a 3-year-old get out of a stroller, walk to the ice cream truck, pick his choice of sugar-on-a-stick, pay, get his change and then walk back to said stroller, and then watch his mom push him down the street like everything is fine as rain? I’ve seen this millions of times before I had kids, didn’t really bother me then; now it does.
You get more excited about the gift you got your child more than your child does. My 12-month-old doesn’t give a damn about the hunk of over-priced plastic I just bought him. If it lights up and keeps his attention for more than 5 seconds he’s fine. I however, simply cannot wait to see the reaction my son have when I hand him his over-priced hunk of plastic. He rains on my parade…every time.
They’re good at mind games. Ever pick up something your child threw on the floor just to have you pick it up again, just so they can throw it back down? It’s a never-ending cycle that I don’t realize I’m in until the 20th time I’ve picked up said object and handed it to him. He laughs, and laughs, and laughs — but don’t take it away then he cries, and cries, and cries. So I hand said object back to him and don’t pick it up when he throws it on the floor and he throws a tantrum. It’s do or die with this guy.
Based on how your child react to strangers will leave strangers open to tell you how good (or bad) you’re raising your child. My son smiles at everyone, almost at any given time. When he smiles at people they say, “Oh and he smiles!” They then look at me and say, “You are doing a good job raising your son!” So, if he didn’t smile at you and clap his hands, would you have told me I was doing a bad job at raising my son?
You become immune to changing diapers. They come in all shapes, textures, smells, and sizes but it phases you none whatsoever. It’ll be while before I’m done changing diapers but before I know it, he’ll be potty-trained and I get to say goodbye to diapers. Forever; or until I need them.
Catching vomit in your hand and think nothing of it. This is up there next to changing diapers on my not-so-ew meter. I realized after the first time my son barfed up a good piece of his meal on me and my desk that, it’s not so bad. It could have been worse. He could have been getting his diaper changed and in the middle of doing so, took a large crap that lands directly on my lap and I would have been fine with it. Yes ladies and gentlemen, it took flight and the last destination was indeed …my lap.
Your patience gets tested in every way possible. When they get to that age where they think they’re big and grown enough to do what they want, they test your patience. My son tests mine every single day. It’s amazing because he don’t realize that he’s trying my patience and I have a feeling he likes seeing mommy on the brink of pulling her own hair out. Like just now. He disconnected me from the internet leaving me believing I didn’t pay it this month. I’m checking my network connection, scratching my head wondering what could be the issue. He’s standing over there with my network cable in his hand staring at me smiling. He’s diabolical.
Sometimes age appropriate toys aren’t good enough. They want to play with your phone and computer and throw your things around the room like toys, as well.
You can walk around naked no more. After a certain age, you don’t want to desensitize your child with your unmentionables. I didn’t realize this until my ex-husband mentioned it to me. I love walking around in the nude. Now I’ll have to wait until my son moves out. A little part of me is dead on the inside because of that fact. 1 year down, 20 to go.
Your life is built around their schedule. It becomes even truer when they start school. I know this all too well help raising my siblings.
You may end up with a few bruises or a loose tooth if you don’t watch out. If you have one of those children who throws their weight around and by weight, I mean that big old cranium on top of their shoulders then you may want to get out of dodge if you haven’t already. Head-butting hurts you more than it hurts them.
They’re little noise machines. It keeps my son occupied when I have things to do. If he want to scream or bang on a pot and I got school work to finish, then he can bang and scream until he pass out from exhaustion. There’s a pitch though that I didn’t think existed in a little person.
When you’re not used to your child not being around, you kind of lose your mind. I realized this when the first time my son’s dad came and picked Adam up. I was watching a television show and I cut it down thinking, “Oh wait, my son is the next room sleeping, let me cut this down so I don’t wake him up”. Then I realized, he wasn’t here so I blasted my television as loud as possible; then I realized I have neighbors and cut it down just a smidget. I was able to get naked, go to sleep, take a walk. I almost forgot what it felt like to not have a child hanging off my hip.
They’re little con artists. My reasoning? Let me tell you. My son and I were at Burger King. I placed my order and was waiting to get my order. All the women behind the counter was swooning over my son. Calling him handsome, cute and chubby. He smiled and talked to them the best way he could. Why did they give him a free slushie? Where was my free slushie? Who do I have to con to get my free slushie?
They get away with murder! They get away with so many things until they’re old enough to know better. There have been times where I’ve said, “If you were older, slapping me with a sippy cup would have gotten you sent to the corner”.
They don’t care. They will go after what they want, when they want. If they don’t like you or if they don’t want you touching them, you will find out the hard way. That’s up there with getting away with murder.
They’ll be out of your hair before you know it. They’ll be grown, working, starting their own families and only showing up during the holidays. So I’m going to enjoy my rascal for as long and as much as I can.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Republican State Senator Wants Single Parenthood Labeled as Child Abuse

Glenn Grothmann, a GOP state senator in Wisconsin, is proposing a bill that would label being a single parent as a contributing factor to child abuse. Ever notice how it’s men who come up with these asinine laws? Their may be studies that show the rate of child abuse to be higher in single parent homes than others but so what? Let me just say this: the president was raised in a single parent home.

There are many reasons why women choose to raise their child alone. Let’s start off with my reason. My soon to be ex-husband left my son alone for 20 minutes and left the door unlocked. To keep CPS out of my life and my son safe, I kicked his ass to the curb and would do it again. Other reasons such as,domestic abusedrug abusealcohol abuse, unemployment, neglect, poverty; the list goes on.

48.982 (2) (g) 2. Promote statewide educational and public awareness campaigns and materials for the purpose of developing public awareness of the problems of child abuse and neglect. In promoting those campaigns and materials, the board shall emphasize non-marital parenthood as a contributing factor to child abuse and neglect.

I’ve been a single parent for 11 days now and there are no signs of abuse going on. My son is very happy and he doesn’t even notice that his dad is gone — simply because his dad didn’t spend too much time with him, video games were more important as well as few other things. I couldn’t be happier, my son couldn’t be happier so what’s the problem? Why should I be labeled as a child abuser because I chose to keep my son out of the system and out of harms way? What about the women who had no choice but to be a single parent because the dad (or mother) walked away? What about the women and men who have spouses in the military? Are they child abusers too? Two parents may be ideal but this guy lives in la-la land if he thinks every parenting situation is either black or white. Where are all the legislative bills that speak out against all the other stated contributing factors of child abuse, such as alcoholism, drug abuse, etc.? How about making criminals responsible for their abuse, not targeting single parents.

Enhanced by Zemanta

I’m Patient but I’ve Never Been This Patient…Am I Crazy?

I’ve always been a patient person — it drives people crazy sometimes. Other people seem to appreciate the patience I’ve mastered over the years. Well today, I found myself thinking about all the things my son has gotten into and all the times he had uncontrollable crying and realized that I’m more patient than I’ve ever been. Parenting has made me a true master of patience. The thing is, I think I’m crazy. I feel like I’m one can short of a six-pack; my elevator doesn’t go to the top floor; I have a few screws loose…something.

My son, he spits, he kicks, he throws things, he cries, he gets irritable, he’s a drama king on occasion but I take it in stride. I smile at him, console him, I kiss and hug him, talk to him, and play with him. Not once have I lashed out at him or got frustrated with him in the 8 months and 1 week he’s been on this planet. The restless nights, the early mornings, the constant need for attention would have anyone wanting to trade places with a meteor out in space or something. He says “mama” day in and day out; people would look at me and hear him say “mama” all the time and would assume I wished my name was dog already.

I love his stubbornness — to go after the things he want, I love his company, I miss him dearly when he falls asleep but wish he would stay asleep longer when he takes a nap, I don’t mind his drool, or his need to dig his gums into the side of my face every chance he gets. Everything about my son I love — I couldn’t be happier. Does that make me crazy?

I don’t understand where it’s coming from. I only get 4 hours a sleep at night (he wakes me up at the crack of dawn every morning), I barely eat during the day, with little to no energy, how am I able to pick my son up and play with him until 8-9 o’clock at night? What’s driving and keeping me sane? What’s making me not want to trade huge monstrous dirty diapers for anything in the world?

I don’t want to believe it but I truly think I’m crazy. You know what though? That’s fine if I am. Because guess what?

If loving my son is crazy then I don’t want to be sane.

Enhanced by Zemanta